8.10.2005

frank chu, part 2: prolific subterfuge

you might not believe this but i swear it's true.

after a couple years of seeing frank chu regularly around downtown sf. and after writing about him yesterday and saying how he'd never directly ranted at me. it finally happened...i've been franked!



i was running late today, i overslept and then i missed a train. so the financial district sidewalks weren't as clotted with clonelike businesstroopers as they typically are when i'm getting to work. as i approached the southeast corner of montgomery and bush (walking up montgomery from the south) i saw frank in his regular post on the corner. he looked towards me and i made eye contact (or, rather, eye-to-shade contact) and i could see it coming, he was gathering his energy, ready to hit me with a shot of his craziness.



before i even reached the corner it happened:
"PRESIDENTIAL PERVERSIONS AND AHHH...CNN EVENING NEWS AND AHHH...SCOTT PETERSON TRIAL REDWOOD CITY AND AHHH...TWELVE GALAXY ABERRATIONS AND AHHH...."

if you have never seen anyone get franked, he gets very close and he looks right at you, with his face only like 18inches from yours. he speaks very loudly, almost yelling. his voice is gravelly and deep and hoarse and he doesn't make coherent sense at all, though he mostly does refer to real things. he is very focused, insistent. he NEEDS you to believe in presidential perversions.



anyway, strange timing, no?
i wonder if frank reads my blog.

frank's story: wikipedia

after all that i decided to do a bit of research into our friend frank. turns out he has his own wikipedia page with lots of info on his history, his protest as performance art, and his signs.

"Frank Chu holds Bill Clinton responsible for directing the CIA to withhold payment to him for being the star of something called "The Richest Family" during the presidency of George H.W. Bush. His protests frequently call for the impeachment of Clinton although Clinton is no longer in office. Bill Clinton and various other US Presidents are frequently accused by Mr. Chu of cooperating with the 12 Galaxies to commit crimes and treasons. Mr. Chu is strongly interested in television reporters and newscasters, who will bring him the publicity he requires to inform the world of the injustices committed against him. This wave of publicity will cause a public outcry, which will result in the impeachment of various US Presidents and the awarding of $20 billion in compensation to Frank for the damages he and his family have suffered."


flickr

there's also a public flickr tag, where i got some of these photos.

four minutes with frank (rhetorical treasons)

some guy did a video interview. there's also a transcript.

"Frank: Also it is about some telepathic scientific inventions with some rhetorical treasons committed with slanders just...with extra sensory perceptions brainwashing me with numerous grand thefts and embezzlements, just trying to create some minor laryngitis or some permanent laryngitis against my campaigns, committed by the CIA and Bill Clinton and just former presidents George Washington and Ben Franklin with some resurrections that were top secret behind closed doors in Washington. But also I think most of the protesters here today that came out today I think they were also on behalf of my protest."

note: he sounds so much more calm on this video than he does when he's just randomly talking to people on the street. the language is much the same though.


frank faq (tasty budweisers)

finally, sfgate has a frank chu faq:

"Q. Which president has been worse to the 12 galaxies, Clinton or Bush?

"A. I would have to say Clinton because of the strong evidence against him for not paying my royalties as a movie star. But Bush still has another term to go, so maybe he will eventually be worse."

...

"Q. Do you ever call in sick or take a vacation?

"A. I was sick once a couple of years ago. I go skiing once a year in Lake Tahoe. Telepathic treason limits my ability to ski on the advanced slopes. I do not ski with my sign."

...

"Q. What do you think about the 12 Galaxies nightclub?

"A. It is an honor. I also like the progressive rock music performed there and the complementary and tasty Budweisers they give me. Sometimes they serve me special cocktails."



so there you have it folks. a san francisco institution, mr. frank chu.
thankyouandgoodnight.